Dear Carolyn: My girlfriend has a horrible cat. Most of this is her fault because shes never tried to train him out of attacking people, stealing food and screaming continually in the night because he used to be an outdoor cat. Her parents live out in the country, and he was basically a farm cat my girlfriend brought with her to the city. She has not even had him fixed.
That sounds very judgmental, but hes a cat. You cant blame him for this stuff, its not like he knows better.
I dont want to live with this cat. My girlfriend says my refusal to move in until the cat is gone is a me or the cat ultimatum. I dont think thats entirely fair; he is 18 so I can just wait out nature. I did suggest she could rehome the cat with her parents, whom he used to live with, but that was the only give up the cat suggestion I made.
We are fighting about this a lot. It seems ridiculous to break up over a cat when we both love cats I mean, I dont like this one but Id certainly never want to see it harmed or unhappy. However, she doesnt want to start waiting for her beloved cat to die and I will not move in with this animal. So maybe ridiculous is all thats left?
I am also allergic. My girlfriend doesnt believe me because I had cats of my own as a kid, but its usually mild enough to medicate away. This cat is, possibly from sheer force of will, more allergy-inducing than most. Not enough to endanger my life, but not pleasant to live with. Ultimatum or Condition?
Dear Ultimatum or Condition?: I am also allergic. My girlfriend doesnt believe me:
Is it possible the cat is your guardian angel, entertainingly packaged as a feline hellbeast?
Id move in with a screaming aggressive unfixed barn cat before Id move in with someone who dismissed my health issues as a ploy to get my way. Allergy-deniers have featured in some of the most horrifying stories ever published in this space. Its sociopathic.
And shes calling you a liar.
See? No more ridiculous reason to break up problem, and no cats had to die in the making of this answer.
If you need other reasons, then see what readers said:
An un-neutered tom cat who grew up in a barn being kept in an apartment? That poor animal, no wonder it acts the way it does. Anonymous
This cat has a horrible girlfriend: doesnt care what the cat does to other people, doesnt want to find a good solution for all three of you, and thinks youre lying to get your way. Dont move in with her even if the cat dies today. Warning
Im allergic but live with two cats because there is a BIG difference in how each particular cat affects you. Oh, and you really need to dump her. Allergic
If she hasnt bothered to have her cat fixed, SHE is responsible for a lot of his behavior, especially the constant screaming. Thank the cat and ditch the girlfriend! Im With Caroline
